The Phil Silvers Show

[Slim]

027: The Big Uranium Strike

Bilko learns that there are uranium deposits under Fort Baxter, and cooks up a plan to get rich. Not one of the best, not particularly clever. But decently funny.

Colonel and Mrs Hall are seen to occupy separate beds again, because even married couples couldn't occupy the same bed in a TV show during the '50s. It was literally against the rules.

https://www.sheknows.com/entertainment/articles/1042865/an-evolution-of-marriage-on-television/

Gina Lollobrigida gets a mention; she only died last week. Would have been 29 when this was made.

[Slim]

028: Bilko and the Beast

A new, and particularly brutish and antagonistic drill sergeant known as The Beast is transferred to Fort Baxter.

The plot basically concerns Bilko's plan to get rid of him. It doesn't make sense. It has a few funny moments, but this one doesn't quite work.

[Red Lenses]

013: The Twitch

A new officer arrives on post, to help Col Hall put a stop to the enlisted men's incessant gambling, most of it organised by Bilko of course.

The Colonel refuses to allow Bilko to go on leave unless he can persuade his men to attend a lecture on Beethoven.

Bilko's solution to this is highly unusual. I think this is another episode that would probably fail 21st century political correctness expectations.

One of my favourites along with the 8 Horse Parley episode where he has a new recruit who says he can predict races using maths (can't remember the name of the episode).

[Slim]

029: The Physical Check Up

Bilko has a hangover and unfortunately, the Colonel wants him and his platoon to take a 20 mile hike. Naturally our favourite Master Sergeant tries to get out of it, and yet - he's disappointed that the Colonel lets him off it without a fight. Then he finds out that he's due to take a medical exam. Is his commanding officer trying to force him out of the Army, for being unfit?

Very funny one.

[Slim]

030: The Recruiting Sergeant

Bilko gets a call from an old comrade with inside information on a hot tip for a horse race. This episode basically concerns Bilko's attempt to place a bet. From the high degree of secrecy and subterfuge involved, not to mention the involvement of the local police later on, I can only assume gambling was illegal in Kansas at the time otherwise the story makes no real sense.

But if so, why would there be horse racing?

Anyway - quite an amusing one but it seems padded out. The jokes are a bit stretched. Could probably be edited down to ten minutes.

[Slim]

031: Hair

Joan has become irritated with Bilko's selfish and inattentive ways, so much so that she's going on a date with someone else. While they're arguing, she makes an indelicate remark about the Master Sergeant's lack of hair.

There's an odd moment where a snippet of speech is badly dubbed on - maybe there was a mic failure when the scene was shot. Or something.

It's a good one, but it's based on a pretty simple gag in which the three other sergeants paste a wig onto Bilko's bald head while he's asleep, then persuade him that his hair restorer treatment has worked a miracle.

Of course, he gets his own back.

[Slim]

032: The Con Men

Doberman receives $500 in compensation from an insurance company, in settlement of an accident he was involved in five years previously.

Unfortunately, he loses it all to con artists on the same day. But they end up playing cards with Bilko.

This, to me, is one of the all time classic Bilko episodes. Before I commenced on this Bilko-thon on January 1st, I hadn't seen any of them for many years. I could probably only have remembered three of them - this one, the one with the chimp and the one where Col Hall plays golf.

Brilliant.

[Slim]

033: War Games

Bilko is supposed to be Best Man at a wedding, but he's late. He's supposed to be restricted to quarters pending a special assignment, and a guard has caught him trying to sneak out of the camp.

Bilko's assignment is to look after a squad of new recruits.

Meanwhile, Fort Baxter is due to take part in war games against the National Guard.

For some reason this one doesn't have the usual Bilko energy. It's not that funny. Odd episode. It doesn't really work. Also - none of Bilko's usual platoon apart from Rocco and Henshaw are in this one.

[Slim]

034: Bilko on Wall Street

Bilko is spending his furlough as a guest of an old army buddy. The Master Sergeant has the impression that his old friend is a Wall Street millionaire with a yacht, but in fact he's a "book keeper" (I assume that's US English for "accountant") on $42 a week, living in modest rented accommodation.

When Bilko finds out that his old friend is being exploited by his pompous and tight-fisted employers, naturally he comes up with a plan to turn the tables. It's risible of course but funny enough and there's a cute twist.

After the disappointment of the previous episode, glad to see the first series bow out on a thoroughly decent instalment.

[Slim]

035: Platoon In The Movies

An officer from 'Army Visual Education' casts Bilko's platoon in a training film on the maintenance of the spark plug. Needless to say this results in abject failure initially, until Bilko comes up with a plan to rescue the project.

Preposterously, off-the-scale implausible but very, very funny. Clever.

Curiously Colonel Hall isn't in this one, neither are the other master sergeants.

And that's the second series off to a banging start. Originally broadcast in September 1956.

Interestingly a different method of filming was used from the second series on. Episodes of the first series were performed like a play, with each scene done in single takes and in order in front of a live audience, so that the actors had learn their lives for the whole thing. For the second and later series, episodes were produced similar to a film with scenes being filmed out of sequence then edited together. The completed episode was then shown to an audience to record the laughter.

[Slim]

036: It's For The Birds

Bilko and his men are watching The $64,000 Question. A sailor wins the big prize, which leads Bilko to the thought that an Army man should have a go. So he looks for someone with expert knowledge on something to represent the platoon, so they can all share the winnings.

It turns out that there's an ornithology expert in the platoon, and it's Corporal Honnegan (aka 'The Stomach' from the eating contest story in the first series, played by Fred 'Herman Munster' Gwynne).

Having said that - although the corporal in question is played by Fred Gwynne, I was doubtful that it's the same character. For one thing he refers to having a large family, and Honnegan only got engaged in the first series. But I checked, and yep it's the same character name.

There's a new mess sergeant - the actor who played Sowici died before the second series was filmed. Ultimately though Sowici will be replaced by Ritzik (Joe Ross), but none of the other regular master sergeants have featured in these first two episodes of the second series. I think the mess sergeant in this one is just a one-off. Colonel Hall isn't in this one again, either. I wonder if Paul Ford had other commitments around this time?

Anyway - a good one.

[Slim]

037: Bilko Goes To College

Bilko and his men are the guests of Schmill University, where they have been asked to provide training on Army vehicle maintenance to students. One of the Deans asks Bilko to provide some army discipline to a young student who has gone astray; a young man who happens to be the son of a millionaire.

Bilko naturally sees an opportunity to make some money at cards, but it's a short-lived hope. The lad has no money of his own and he's already in debt to a gambling syndicate.

It's another Bilko-vs-the-bad guys-while-trying-to-feather-his-own-nest sort of episode.

There's a moment in this one when the audience breaks into spontaneous applause - actually nowhere near the episode's funniest moment. Seems a bit odd but then, this did happen 60-odd years ago. Different world.

Quite a clever one, this one.

None of it takes place on Fort Baxter and there's still no sign of Colonel Hall or the other sergeants.

[Slim]

037: The Girl From Italy

The brief synopsis of this one as featured in Wikipedia's episode guide is "Bilko attempts to make a newly arrived immigrant girl look presentable". Just imagine pitching that as a script idea to the BBC in the present day.

Bilko finagles tickets to My Fair Lady - featuring Julie Andrews, I didn't know she was a thing in the '50s - for himself, Rocco and Henshaw while they're visiting New York. Meanwhile, Rocco learns that his brother has called off his wedding with an Italian girl who's just arrived off a boat, after meeting her for the first time. Apparently arranged marriages were a thing in the Italian immigrant community back then.

The Italian national stereotype is really laid on thick here - Rocco's big momma pleading "she's-a nice-a girl" to his brother, for example and bursting into overwrought tears with all the Italian hand-wringing going on. And there's an elderly Italian gentleman who only ever says "hello Joe!".

But I think the actors used probably are at least Italian American, and (hey) it's a sitcom after all.

Of course they did their best to make the lowly immigrant girl look unsophisticated and peasant-like to start off with, but actually from the moment we see her it's obvious she's a babe - albeit swathed in black peasant dress with pigtails. Then again I suppose I'm a connoisseur.

The whole story is, of course, a sort of affectionate pastiche of My Fair Lady.

Sinatra gets a mention. There's something slightly melancholy, I find, about hearing these references to people who would continue to be household names in the '60s and '70s, from way back when.

Not a bad one.

[Slim]

039: The Face On The Recruiting Poster

We're back at Fort Baxter for the first time in the second series, and a new private (called McLusty) is transferred to Bilko's platoon. It seems that he's transferred around very regularly, because the local WACs always fight over him.

Bilko is sceptical about this until he takes him over to the admin office, where the WACs more or less start a riot as soon as he arrives. And of course the wily Master Sergeant sees an opportunity to make a fortune.

McLusty is played by Eric Fleming who, I've just read, died in a canoe accident ten years after this was filmed. Apparently he's best known for starring alongside Clint Eastwood in Rawhide in the early '60s. Fleming certainly is a good-looking lad, but I think this episode would have worked better if they could have got Clint!

The basic gag that the story pivots around is that Doberman is very ugly. I suppose the PC folks would call that "ugly shaming" or some such nonsense now but truth to tell, I did feel a bit unfomfortable for Maurice Gosfield, who plays the hapless aesthetically compromised private.

Sinatra gets a mention again, so does Perry Como.

The payoff to this one is absolutely belting.

Nice to be back on Fort Baxter with the usual sets, and Colonel Hall is back for the first time in the second series as well.

I recognised one of the Pentagon officers as a familiar face, but couldn't put a name to the face. I looked it up - Tom Poston. Having looked up his list of TV and film credits on Wikipedia I wasn't quite sure why he was familiar. He was in Mork & Mindy, maybe that's it. Or maybe just one of those small part actors that crops up in a lot of things.

[Slim]

040: Bilko's War Against Culture

A Special Services officer is assigned to Fort Baxter, to discourage indiscriminate gambling via the introduction of cultural classes. Exactly the same idea as one of the first series episodes, except that this time, it's a WAC. And something of a hottie - which, as it turns out, will be an important element of the plot.

The basic story is - Bilko outwits her, then when he finds out it's her first assignment and she's upset about it, he's overcome with guilt and accommodates her. Sort of.

Made me sad to think that the lovely young actress who plays the new officer would be an old woman, if she were still alive. But I checked and she died at the age of 93 in 2017. Dina Merrill. Apparently she was also heiress to $250 million. What a catch!

Not a bad one, not a great one.

By the way the young man at the top left in this pic is Pvt "Sugie" Sugarman, played by Terry Carter. Terry is now the only surviving member of the Bilko platoon cast. Pictured below at the Phil Silvers Museum in Coventry in 2020, and looking pretty good for 92.