Mum

[Slim]

My mum died last night, at the age of 94. By coincidence, this news came to me a day before the house I was brought up in is due to leave our family after more than 60 years.

Honestly, the news came as a relief to a degree. I said to my wife last weekend that I hoped the end would come soon for her, because she had been confined to a room in a nursing room for months, barely able to move around and mostly unconscious in her last weeks. And I've been expecting it for some time.

I feel sorry for my older brother who has done a wonderful job of looking after her, but wasn't able to see her in her final days because he has COVID. My other brother was with her when she died but she wasn't conscious when he arrived, and she wouldn't have known he was there.

I feel a bit of remorse that I didn't go and see her more often this last, well, nearly thirty years or so after my dad died. Unfortunately two of her three sons lived a long way from the North-East. I was going to drive up to see her tomorrow night and I'm sorry to say I hadn't seen her since Christmas.

Odd to be processing these two things simultaneously, but it seems poetically apt that the house and my mum are leaving us at the same time.

I've always loved this photo of my mum. She was 22 when this was taken, leaving hospital with her first child in 1950. Yet somehow she looks like the same mature, confident woman that I've known all my life.

[Matt2112]

My condolences to you and the family, James.

She had a good innings, as they say.

[pxr5]

My condolences to you and your family too James.

[dom]

So sorry to hear that James.

Great photo!  Looks from a bygone age

[David L]

Sorry to hear that sad news, condolences to you and the family

[captainkurtz]

I'm so sorry James.  That is a beautiful picture - she looks so smart and classy.  Peoples dressed so well back then.  All my pictures of my dad when he arrived in the UK - always wearing a suit, shirt and tie.

Wishing you nothing but the best in the coming weeks.

[pdw1]

My condolences too to you and all your family.
There will be tough times ahead but always remember the good times.

[Nickslikk2112]

Sorry to hear that James.

It'll be rough for a bit even if you do think it's a bit of a relief. Hold onto your memories

[Nick]

Condolences James. That's a fantastic pic, my mother is also in a nursing home and I go when I can, to be honest I'm not sure if she knows much about my visits so I wouldn't bother yourself about remorse, best remember her as your mother.

[Ali]

Very sorry to hear this James, sincere condolences to you and your family

[Basspedalman]

Sorry to hear that James, I lost my Mum when I was 25, so 30 years ago but they never leave your hearts. She was probably happy that you were off living your life so don't beat yourself up too much about not seeing her since Christmas. Big hugs!

[Spirit of Rich]

Hello mate, so sad to hear this, that's a heavy emotional burden to cope with all at once.

Hope you're bearing up and that we bump into each other again before too long xx

[Thenop]

Only reading this now James, sorry for your loss.
The picture you posted is indeed lovely, something to be cherished. I hope you will continue in treasuring wonderful memories.

[Pudders]

Apologies for being so late on this James but my condolences on the loss of your Mum. Your regrets over seeing her in recent times resonate very strongly with me, I was a terrible son for the last few months of my mothers life, though I knew that she didn't have long left with us. In the end I did see her in the hospice, the night before she died, I have that I guess...

Anyway, cherish the many memories you have, she'll always be there for you.

[Nick]

Lost my mum last night, she was 85 and spent her final few years with dementia in a care home, clearing her room out tomorrow. Although sad, it was nice to be at her bedside for the last few days with family and we had a good few laughs amongst the tears.